Forgiveness is one of those concepts that is talked about everywhere, it seems. Religion talks about it, psychologists talk about it, and quite a few personal development programs talk about it. Books discuss it, scientists study it, inmates crave it (some of them). But, what is it? I mean, what is it really? How does it work and why does it work? How do you know that you have truly forgiven someone completely?

I think the main reason we get confused about forgiveness is because we try to forgive the person rather than their actions, thoughts, feelings,etc.


Analytical Thinking vs. Negative Thinking

The Basics

Analyzing something is quite different from negative thinking (judgement based thinking). The former requires taking what you know about what has happened in the past and what you believe will happen in the future based on past results, and projecting them into a comprehensive statement about whether this is something that you want or whether you would rather have a different outcome. It’s non-judgmental in nature, and it requires very little emotional involvement. When you are analyzing, you don’t need to spend time figuring out whether it’s “good” or “bad”.


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