Dark Nights of the Soul

“Dark Night of the Soul” is a term originally used in Catholicism to talk about a difficult period and a crisis of faith that ultimately leads to a deeper connection and union with God. For me – not being Catholic – it’s about that deep sense of connection with the Divine.

It’s a period of intense disillusionment, and beliefs that don’t serve our ultimate purpose fall away.

One place I feel as though spirituality – especially New Age spirituality – often fails is honoring the Dark Nights of the Soul that we go through. For most of us, there’s pressure to have it all “figured out” or to “find the silver lining” before the body-mind has finished processing the emotional fallout of the Dark Night of the Soul.

Last week I shared about the trauma I experienced last year and how it almost tanked my business (and my life, but hey! I’m still here.) You can read part 1 and part 2 by clicking the links below if you missed it.

>>Part 1: I was traumatized and almost lost my business<<

>>Part 2: What I’m doing now<<

This week I’m hyperfocused on recording the content for the Intuition Mastery System – the new version of the Psychic Mechanics Course.

I love creating courses, outlining transformational content, and working with students.

I don’t love recording. Multiple takes trying to get it just right, having to listen to my own voice during editing, the fun of waiting for videos to render (the process of taking the video from my editing software to a finished product I can use with other programs… IYKYK).

After the hell that was May 2019-February 2022, it’s difficult in a new way.

Every video brings up a new wave of grief for all I’ve lost, all I’ve gained, the changes I’ve been through, and the things that are no longer the same about who I am and what is true about my life.

It’s intensely uncomfortable.

And every time I take the time to fully process those feelings, I access deeper peace, wisdom, and sovereignty than I’ve had access to before.

Even science has caught up to the fact that deeply feeling our emotions (especially unpleasant ones) can help us to be happier and healthier over time. (The article I link is specific to feeling sensations and how it decreases the chance of relapsing with depression, and there’s broad scientific support that depression increases health risks over time.)

It may be great in the long term, but holy hell is it uncomfortable and unpleasant right now.

So I’ve built a lot of space in my days. Hours to wake up every morning. Hours to process. Hours to go deep into a hobby and let the subconscious process while my conscious mind takes a break.

Things take the time they take.

And it’s safe for me to take that time to go deeper within myself and rebuild my own foundations.

It’s safe for you, too, though your circumstances and the particulars are no doubt different.

May you be well,

Rev. “EA” Kerti

PS – Have you been through a Dark Night of the Soul recently? How are you integrating the lessons? If you feel inspired to, email me at ea at spiritualmechanic.com and let me know.

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