Someone asked me how I’m so fearless, and truth be told, it’s not the first time I’ve gotten this question.
I have a naturally reserved way of being that lends itself to appearing like confidence.
Even when I’m internally freaking out, I come off as composed, measured, steady and “together.”
My heart can be racing and I’ll sound calm – that’s just a natural part of my own way of being.
But guess what?
I have a diagnosed anxiety disorder and PTSD.
I don’t talk about them publicly much because they really aren’t the most interesting thing about me, and I don’t take the emotions personally.
My body can create a fear reaction and I likely won’t give weight to it unless there’s a specific reason to (such as there’s a car in my lane, or there’s a situation I need to address head-on.)
The Big Lie
In spirituality, especially new age circles, there’s a lie that I find absolutely toxic to folks honoring their spiritual calling.
There is a lie that says that you must conquer your fear before you take action toward your dreams or your calling.
In my experience fear and internal resistance often point to exactly what actions I need to take.
“Like a magnetized needle floating on a surface of oil, Resistance will unfailingly point to true North – meaning that calling or action it most wants to stop us from doing. We can use this. We can use it as a compass. We can navigate by Resistance, letting it guide us to that calling or action that we must follow before all others.” – Steven Pressfield
There are absolutely times when you do want to address your fears and anxieties.
If you know your next steps and you find yourself so fearful of taking action that you feel paralyzed or unable to move, then please do work on your own healing in whatever way is most supportive.
Or if you know what you want but you find yourself sabotaging your own success over and over again, definitely get support to clear those old fears and anxieties.
From an energy clearing to a therapist or any other healing session, honor your current experience and heal the fears.
That being said, if it’s normal insecurity and you think you have to feel invincible before taking action, guess what? You’ll be waiting a looooong time before you start honoring your calling.
When my clients come to me and ask me to tell them how to never experience fear, I usually tell them, “Remove your amygdala and adrenal glands – but be warned, you need both to live.”
The amygdala is commonly referred to as the “fight or flight” center of the brain. But what’s not commonly talked about is how the amygdala also is the seat of compassion in the brain.
People with more active amygdalae tend to be both more anxious AND more compassionate. They are two sides of the same coin.
The adrenal glands are required for the “oomph” in the flight or fight response. They give you a shot of cortisol and adrenaline to help you defeat any immediate threats in your vicinity.
But you know what they also do? Regulate stress – you cannot feel relaxed without the adrenal glands.
Trust me. I know because I don’t have them.
I have to regulate them manually by taking the equivalent of what they produce.
If I don’t take the medication on time, I’ll immediately start to feel a significant increase in stress and a decrease in my ability to handle stress.
Dropping a pen can cause me to cry.
If I take too much, I’ll crave every carb in the known universe and feel sluggish.
Fear and Your Calling
Fear, my friend, is a normal part of the human experience.
It’s okay to have it.
If it’s debilitating, absolutely seek relief and find support.
But if it’s just a little fear that you can tune out, remember that you do NOT have to have perfect emotions to honor your calling.
Aligned action is stronger than a thought or an emotion.
If the fear is there?
Well, as Van Gogh once said, “If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.”